FoolsfollyJournalGreat Illness Kicked My Ass

November 11th, 2009

Great Illness Kicked My Ass

But I now stand atop it victorious.

Flaming T-Rexes fall from the blood red sky behind me and I pose in a Frank Frazetta pose with a savage woman at my feet adoring me.

It was bad when it was going. I could barely talk, breathe, and had no energy to do anything but play Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2 (which is a 6/10 by the way). Couldn't afford a doctor so we did what is commonly known as stupid and self-medicated. Guess what! I guessed right! I'm feeling a fuckton better.

So I see the internet hasn't devolved into a Mad Max world yet....still waiting for that 'enter the computer' tech so we can all fight over Cookies and have a clearly fake mustachio'd Data with six shooters firing at us. Hopefully Michael Dorn will save us.

Eh, who am I kidding. I feel like the bastard can turn around and say, "Fuck it. I don't take shit from anyone!" And the battle would begin anew. And after the thrashing we both took it's likely going to end messily.

It's like the Incredible Hulk verse Juggernaut.

Erm....but seriously don't worry too damn much. The worst is over by a lot.

....erm...I know I'll end this by copying and pasting my latest message to Geekers which....it's explain itself:

Sorry went AFK there for a while....which means bathroom break. It wouldn't have happened if the FDA would fucking ok my designs on the toilet/computer chair! But they're all 'it's not sanitary!' Of fucking course it's not! But neither is public bathrooms and we use them! Hell drill Sargent apparently love eating off of their floors! Who's gonna crack down on that shit, hmm? No one. It's fucking politics, sir.

Of course, if I did get such a chair it'd only be a matter of minutes before the first costumer figures out that with WiFi and a laptop he could just move the chair to the kitchen next to the fridge and who wants to live in a society where that's acceptable? I mean it's bad enough that you have to assume that like 80% of the guys you're talking to online are wacking it....plus WiFi plus bathroom opens all kinds of doors best left closed.

....but a fat guy on a computer chair/toilet with a laptop lightly burning his massive thighs as he eats a hogie right out of the fridge may be the greatest and most accurate description of the internet thus far in its existance.

What the hell were we talking about? Who the fuck's Tucker Max?

Thanks for Reading.

EDIT:

Geekers pointed me in the direction of Tucker Max. Here's the Midget Story I think it's a good representation of the man.

Posted 2 months ago by Foolsfolly Comments (5)	+ 4 Funny

Comments

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CapDac

Adventurer

#1 Posted 2 months ago	[ Reply ] [ Quote ]
Oh, Tucker Max...you are a fool. An entertaining piece of shit. Some of his stories are really funny, but if I met the man himself I would doubtlessly hate him. And his upcoming film looks like a pure vanity piece. Oh well. Not gonna see it.

jedipoet

FuckThatGuy

#2 Posted 2 months ago	[ Reply ] [ Quote ]
glad your feeling better sir. the internet is a far better place with you around.

ErokDragun

ComicMessiah

FORUM MOD

#3 Posted 2 months ago	+ 1 Funny [ Reply ] [ Quote ]
missed you! I always look forward to your comments on my stuff....w/out you around, it hurts my soul is that gushing enough for you?

Foolsfolly

Mentally ill

#4 Posted 2 months ago	+ 1 Funny [ Reply ] [ Quote ]
In reply to ErokDragun, #3: You're making me blush in front of the stiffs!

colonelMCmuf

#5 Posted 2 months ago	+ 1 Funny [ Reply ] [ Quote ]
I don;t think the internet existed for that short while. I wasn't on so no one important can verify otherwise.

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